A girl who could easily make friends till sometime ago is a not so popular one now. Is that what mid life crisis does to you. In addition to loosing all the current contact, at 30s something you find it really hard to socialise with anyone who is but likeminded. Saying ‘sorry’ also doesn’t come easily and even if you capitulate some gutts to say it, its never accepted. and you don’t know whome to blame me myself or irene or the rest of the world or a specific timing and circumstances. I keep saying ‘detachment’ is one art I am slowly and steadily mastering but in reality it is the other way round. With the amount of emotional investment each relationship takes its hard to see youself loosing slowly and steadily on the verge of bankruptcy. Thank you blog that you don’t punish me for putting my big foot in my mouth or not meeting up my commitments.
A friend of mine had been forcing me lately to start writing professionally. Since the timing is so right these days it might just turn out to be a masterpiece for all you know. And I give him/her lame execuse like who is going to publish it. I hadnt understood the meaning of the word ‘recluse’ till I actually started finding solace in being one. If there was a public forum besides my blog which nobody reads (thank god for it) I would have really struggled to say the five letter word called ‘sorry’ to all those I have really made happy in my journey of being one. This post reminds of a saying ‘good riddens to bad rubbish’ which I am sure most people who have been associated with me are echoing now. I hope not. If at all unspoken/spoken words would speak louder than actions. I would not be so much of a looser in life. I wish I could communicate so easily with all those people who matter and who I have lost, including my parents to tell them how much I care and love. Now the one thing which makes the first thing to do in my to do list of things you want to do before you die, is ‘I hope I can make some people proud’……
A friend of mine had been forcing me lately to start writing professionally. Since the timing is so right these days it might just turn out to be a masterpiece for all you know. And I give him/her lame execuse like who is going to publish it. I hadnt understood the meaning of the word ‘recluse’ till I actually started finding solace in being one. If there was a public forum besides my blog which nobody reads (thank god for it) I would have really struggled to say the five letter word called ‘sorry’ to all those I have really made happy in my journey of being one. This post reminds of a saying ‘good riddens to bad rubbish’ which I am sure most people who have been associated with me are echoing now. I hope not. If at all unspoken/spoken words would speak louder than actions. I would not be so much of a looser in life. I wish I could communicate so easily with all those people who matter and who I have lost, including my parents to tell them how much I care and love. Now the one thing which makes the first thing to do in my to do list of things you want to do before you die, is ‘I hope I can make some people proud’……
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