Perfect timing....

I must be like the biggest looser on this planet and all the other planets which have life. If you can count them too. Why? Cause, however proud I might (subconsciously) be for my witty, Freudian slips, when it comes to giving back to someone, I just cant do it. I either am tongue tied or don’t understand the comment till its too late, or have all other (she is my friend afterall) kinda stupid reasons, refraining me from replying with equal venom.. You know wat I mean right. I donno if it is a common disease. But its definitely a frequent feature with me. I cant reply instantly ever, especially when it is required to. I mostly am as bitchy/as sarcy as you want me to be barring that one point of time. And you know wat, this just adds to the list of my most embarrassing moments/things that I so regret and want to wipe-out from my life.
The other day somebody actually managed to squash my super-elated spirits after a shopping spree by some super mean comments.. Which is like a cardinal sin. Shopping works as an aphrodisiac for me. I like to flaunt, when I shop for something (even if its a pair of lingerie) show it to the entire world and make them feel jealus. Not that its not like this otherwise, but more so when I am happy after a successful excursion. The last thing you want is someone to tell you ‘oh baby you wasted so much of money on it, this colour wont suit you, give it to me it will suit me better’. Ideally I shud have killed that person, rather than sulking over here. But guess wat as dumb as I could be I didn’t reply to that comment barring a looser grin, conveying, ‘I m sure u don’t mean that do u’? Cmon I could have done better, if not as bad. But all I do is, sit and sulk about the comment when u had the time, the ambience and the calibre to reply with equal audacity. And I didnt cause I was just tongue tied, it didn’t click at that time and all the xyzee reasons. Now no excuse like ‘I was in a hurry would do any damage control’.
Can somebody please teach me, how to use your skill set at the appropriate time. Cause there is no point boasting about it if you cant use it. Urghhhhhhhhh….

Music....

Jab Tab Dil Mein Faith
This World Is A Lovely Place
Dil Mein Rakhna To Fight
Everythings Gona Be Allrite
Har Pal Woh Hai Tere Saaath
Jab Tak Tu Hai Uske Saath
To Hai Darne Ki Kya Baat
Everythings Gona Be Allrite
Tu Mera Dil.. Tu Meri Jaan..
And I Just Wana Let You Know…
Everythings Gona Be Allrite Wow O - 2
Jab Tab Hum Side By Side
Everythings Gona Be Allrite - 2

One of my favourite songs these days. Not that I like the movie which inspires this song. But the lyrics and music is just soooo good to hear. And music does the trick for me considering how moody I am. It just THE thing for me. It peps me up, pulls me out of gloom, makes me sway, and does soemthign to me which unexplainable, provided it’s of my choice. That reminds me I have an ipod since more than a month now, and I havent been able to fill it with my favorite songs. I am so dying to. :(

How do you move on?

Most of us savour our first relationship or the longest relationship or the most memorable relationship. But you cant savour every relationship reciprocated or non reciprocated. As per all the bad books on romance and stuff like that its not humanly possible to fall in love again and again that too with equal propensity. Then either its not love or something is definitely wrong with the person, or he/she is stupid. You can be indifferent towards all the jilted affairs, but jealous, hurt, remembering things is so not normal that too about all the ppl in life big or small. All those small little things should have been completely forgotten, ignored, dead and buried now. But there are some ppl who take longer to fall in love and even longer to forget it, even if it means an entire life time. And you don’t even know if it is love cause its with too many ppl, and second it was too short lived. Yes it is humanly possible to fall for more than 1 person with equal obsession. Still remember each of them fondly whenever encountered. And I am sure there is never a person in isolation. Though we all think we are unique in our own way.
But some ppl seriously got to learn, to let the bygones be bygones and move on in life. To understand that ppl move on and so does life. Even though you want to them to cling on to you like forever. I have always believed its easier falling in love then coming out of it. And now I know it for sure. Then why the hell has 3 years not been enuf. How can a person so contradict his own statements? Why do you still feel that pinch deep down in your heart? Imagine, if it is every now and then cause there are hoards. The reasons are never enuf, music, car, blog, places, situations etc etc. And you know you are ancient to the core as if life never moved on and will never do. You hate it, when you know that it still has an effect on you whereas the other side is never bothered, never was and never be.

The 'IN' thing....

I havent blogged in a while now. Cudnt find any specific reasons to rite on. Not that there is one right now. When I started riting this post, I found out, that the word ‘blog or bloging’ is not a recognised, word in MS dictionary. Though it’s The IN thing these days. Anybody and everybody is doing it, cast, creed, gender etc etc no bar. Infact its become such a fad to blog these days. That they had his complete article in the Times of India the other day on Priyanka Gandhi aka Priyanka Vadhera Gandhi or whatever on her new found love / fascination for blogging. Why did she have to realise it so late that she can rite comprehensible English especially after studying from JMC. She really makes JMCites feel proud. And are we suppose to feel blessed that thank god finally our politicians will be able to correct the Freudian slip. How modest can they be.
Anyway my point here is, even though blogging is an incorrect word as per the dictionary, its fashionable to blog now and anybody who is not doing it is oh so LS. You know what I mean rite. I somehow cant connect with such ideas. But I know a lot of people who right just for the heck of it, without letting out their inner most self.
Certain things like riting, photography, painting and all creative skills shud be inborn and not inculcated or forced. But I guess all of us need a vent like me. Hence a blog. Ironically all the celebrities who blog to be in the rat race, cant even express their genuine views. And its just another public attention seeking tactics. I wonder though, how can you rite without a pinch of you in it. Most of my posts are autobiographical. I think I have to learn this trick of trade.

It must have been love, but it's over now....

I had been thinking of riting this post since quite some time now. Is it normal to fall in love obsessively, and then fall out of it. I have heard that a relationship goes through a v shaped graph. But does one actually fall back in love with the same person, once he is out of it and with whom he has once been so madly in love with. Confusing right, all I am trying to figure out is it possible to ignite the same spark again, once lost.
Before I try and look for that answer, is it normal to fall out of love. What happens to the age old saying then ‘and they lived happily ever after…’. And how did our parents manage to spend so many years together without having one single extra marital, without failing to cross the forbidden line. You know what I mean right. How is it possible? What the ‘exceptional’ ingredient missing they had, which always kept the dish fresh. Is it cause:-
1. They never had sex before marriage. So obviously they had nothing to compare with. Plus anything done had a complete novelty to it and was a welcome pleasant surprise. So each day they had something new to discover. And by the time they realised that there was no discovery left, they had several other things on priority, rather than sex.
But why didn’t my mum tell me or give me all these reasons. Rather than that lame statement like good gals don’t have sex before marriage.
2. Our parents mostly had arrange marriage, so they had zilch expectations before entering an alliance. And that you know helps in overcoming a lot of problems. Its like a clean slate, where u can paint your own painting.
But then I have always believed that its better to marry a known devil than an unknown devil.
3. They used to live in joint or bigger families before, so the chances of getting bored with each other were comparatively less.
4. Today’s generation is abnormal. They are low on patience, tolerance, emotions and everything. We just want everything quick and if that doesn’t happen we start looking around for greener pastures, who has the time to wait and watch.
5. Wimmen were not so vocal about their feelings. They weren’t so independent either, to walk out of a marriage, unlike today.
But that isn’t completely wrong or is it.
You know I feel the thin line between right and wrong is slowly diminishing. But that is no way of justifying the problem. Especially when u are not at the receiving end. I mean the person who is still in love. I donno how to damage control it. Can anyone suggest me a way, for two things A) if its okay to be out of it, and that its not so immoral after all. B) how do u convey the other person that u are out of it, without hurting anybody’s sentiments.
For once I m not hopping from one relationship to the other, cause I am not in love with anybody. I think love is an over hyped feeling, which essentially does work like an aphrodisiac but its very short lived with loads of side-effects.
So why cant we live till its happily ever after, and not blame anyone from moving on, whenever that is. Its like the most dreadful feeling to convey that listen I am over you now, and can we be just friends, cause u don’t ignite that passion anymore. I know strong words, I wish it was as easier to say it and as it was typing over here.

I am back...

I am so glad to be back at office after a never ending hiatus of two weeks. I know most of us would scream at the fact, that who wants to be back in office especially after a winter vacation. Not me, not me, not me. But believe me. I was somehow dying to come back to the office. As if I was ‘office sick’. We all have heard about home sickness but I am sure not about office sickness. Please take it as my copyright term. Which kinda justifies the meaning of the saying ‘necessity is the mother of invention’.
Don’t ask me reasons why I was office sick. Cause I myself donno about it. And not that I have any specific work/people/ambience etc etc to entertain me in the office. But I think I m addicted to my computer and this virtual world. And no vacation/outing/break helps till I am not accompanied by this virtual bf(s) of mine. I just miss everything over here, my comfortable chair which flattens my already flattered non-existent bum, my tea/coffee vending machine, regular dose of bantering, my mail box cluttered with fan mails seeking for life ruining advises. All my looser friends who so miss me, my ego-maniac office spouse, my never ending ability to surf the net without any rhyme or reason, especially when most of the porn/astro/lovology related sights are restricted. Gosh the list is endless, and there are still soem 10,000+ other reasons I havent disclosed it here, which make me so miss my office.
This place just gives me a high with or without work. Something abnormal with me right. But I m back and I m back for gooooooooooooooood atleast for an year now. Cause I will only to take a chutti when I have no other option.