Does getting into a relationship ruin a friendship?
I mean imagine two great friends. They gel like a house on fire. Read each other like a psychiatrist. Connect on a wavelength which no one understands. Behave like an alter ego. Speak through telepathy. Share the same sense of humour. The entire world thinks there is something cooking between the two of them. And they giggle about the same in private. Yet have no vested interests in each other.
They say, sometimes you yourself don’t come to know its love, till someone makes you realise it. And sometimes a lie when said to often becomes the truth. Sounds like a story straight from some typical bollywood movie. But this could be a real life situation.
One would think if they are so good a friend, they would be an ideal couple too when in a relationship. Typically yes, but this is where one goes wrong most of the times. Sometimes best friends turn out to be disastrous when in a relationship. Though most of us disagree on that, for simple reasons like if they are so good with each other and they so understand each other. It would be easier for them to make each other happy. Cause its like pleasing yourself. Remember they are like mirror image of each other.
Sadly this is never the case. Most of the best friends when in a relationship become a very sad couple. Cause A) we tend to expect a lot in a relationship, which is as good as zilch in friendship. Friendship gives a lot of space, freedom, understanding and all that. This somehow is missing in relationship. Most human beings tend to become possessive and jealous. This is normal I personally would not like to see my guy flirting around, however big a flirt I may be. Call it double standards or whatever.
B) in a relationship one tends to loose his/her identity. Most of us do things which please the other person, and act the way he/she wants us to. This is not the case in friends. We don’t think / go / do basis wat are best friends like, right? Then, why otherwise, why does it change as soon as one say those three magical words. Ironic, but true.
Everything about him/her makes you conscious, which was not the case before. You didn’t stress on your dress till sometime before. You didn’t bite your tongue before saying something all this time before. You didn’t waste your weekend thinking over where the relation is going all this time before. And so an so forth.
Whatever said and done, I am still not convinced that everything is so lopsided as a result of such conversion. I am sure there are certain advantages too, which I am suppose to be missing. If you can think of any let me know. Till that time long live friendships.
I mean imagine two great friends. They gel like a house on fire. Read each other like a psychiatrist. Connect on a wavelength which no one understands. Behave like an alter ego. Speak through telepathy. Share the same sense of humour. The entire world thinks there is something cooking between the two of them. And they giggle about the same in private. Yet have no vested interests in each other.
They say, sometimes you yourself don’t come to know its love, till someone makes you realise it. And sometimes a lie when said to often becomes the truth. Sounds like a story straight from some typical bollywood movie. But this could be a real life situation.
One would think if they are so good a friend, they would be an ideal couple too when in a relationship. Typically yes, but this is where one goes wrong most of the times. Sometimes best friends turn out to be disastrous when in a relationship. Though most of us disagree on that, for simple reasons like if they are so good with each other and they so understand each other. It would be easier for them to make each other happy. Cause its like pleasing yourself. Remember they are like mirror image of each other.
Sadly this is never the case. Most of the best friends when in a relationship become a very sad couple. Cause A) we tend to expect a lot in a relationship, which is as good as zilch in friendship. Friendship gives a lot of space, freedom, understanding and all that. This somehow is missing in relationship. Most human beings tend to become possessive and jealous. This is normal I personally would not like to see my guy flirting around, however big a flirt I may be. Call it double standards or whatever.
B) in a relationship one tends to loose his/her identity. Most of us do things which please the other person, and act the way he/she wants us to. This is not the case in friends. We don’t think / go / do basis wat are best friends like, right? Then, why otherwise, why does it change as soon as one say those three magical words. Ironic, but true.
Everything about him/her makes you conscious, which was not the case before. You didn’t stress on your dress till sometime before. You didn’t bite your tongue before saying something all this time before. You didn’t waste your weekend thinking over where the relation is going all this time before. And so an so forth.
Whatever said and done, I am still not convinced that everything is so lopsided as a result of such conversion. I am sure there are certain advantages too, which I am suppose to be missing. If you can think of any let me know. Till that time long live friendships.
4 comments:
While I kind off agree with you, if the friendship stays and a relationship just compliments it, nothing like that !!!
but unfortunately that does not happen a lot of times !!!
Yeah, unfortunately I don't think it's quite possible to have your cake and eat it too.
I'm glad you are doing all this 'write' stuff. Your clarity, scope and depth are only getting better.
And of course, I'm 'spirited.' Ha! Go eat your heart out;-)
Om: I think adulteration is after all not a very good idea... though i was looking for some points which could make me think otherwise.
WHWN: you've got a hope... can i remind you however that u slowly developing a tolerance for me... high time u admit it.
Missy, I dhafta tolerate you.
On any day, I'd rather talk to you than look incredulously at dim-witted women. Sigh!
It's called getting caught between Lucifer and the azure sea!
sob sniffle sigh!
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